Have you ever wondered why seemingly trivial incidents provoke intense reactions in you? Or why do certain aspects of your behaviour remain a mystery even to yourself?
The concept of the shadow self, a powerful idea from psychology, might hold the answers.
Understanding the Shadow Self
The shadow self refers to the parts of ourselves that we are unwilling to reveal and intentionally suppress.
We often forcefully suppress the shadow self because it conflicts with our “ego ideal” or “superego” – the person we want to become. Have you ever found yourself exploding at something innocuous, hiding things from your loved ones, or engaging in addictive behaviour?
Your suppressed shadow may be at the root of this.
Dexter’s ‘Dark Passenger’ and Walter White’s ‘Heisenberg’
I immediately remember Dexter’s Dark Passenger or Walter White’s Heisenberg when I think about the concept and how it applies to film and TV.
Both these onscreen characters have undesirable and dangerous parts of themselves that they attempt to hide from people around them.
The destructive events that occur throughout their lives are the result of their shadow selves rising to the surface and controlling them.
Dexter’s ‘Dark Passenger’
In Dexter’s case, it is particularly complex – how can his need to kill be channelled more healthily?
Dexter’s Dark Passenger represents his compulsive urge to kill, a trait he tries to manage by targeting other murderers, thereby attempting to align his dark impulses with a moral code.
This struggle highlights the intricate balance between his desire to live a normal life and his uncontrollable urge to kill. His character presents a profound exploration of the human psyche, questioning whether inherently dark tendencies can be redirected toward a form of justice or if they are inherently destructive.
I find Dexter’s character fascinating because he is dealt a particularly challenging card. His dark passenger is particularly dark – far darker than anyone else who may come across this blog – yet he somehow creates the illusion that he walks in the light.
It is implied, however, by the end of the show that Dexter’s darkness has destroyed the lives of the people he holds dearest.
Walter White’s ‘Heisenberg’
In Walter White’s case, it is clear how Walter has suppressed his shadow for far too long – it could have been channelled in far more socially acceptable ways. Walter White’s transformation into Heisenberg is a stark portrayal of how repressed ambitions and frustrations can erupt into a powerful, destructive force.
Initially, Walter is depicted as a mild-mannered high school chemistry teacher, whose latent desires for power and recognition are ignited by his cancer diagnosis and financial desperation. His journey into the world of drug manufacturing and crime is a manifestation of his shadow self, which had been simmering beneath the surface for years.
The Heisenberg persona becomes a vehicle for Walter to express his previously suppressed traits – ambition, ruthlessness, and a hunger for dominance.
His character arc serves as a cautionary tale about the dangers of repressing one’s true self, suggesting that unaddressed shadows can lead to devastating consequences when they finally emerge.
Obviously both Dexter and Walter White represent characters with additional traits of the dark triad which include psychopathy, narcissism and Machiavellianism.
The Dangers of the Shadow
Both Dexter’s and Walter White’s stories serve as powerful narratives about the complexities of the human psyche.
They delve into the concept of the shadow self, illustrating how suppressed aspects of one’s personality can surface and disrupt lives. These characters compel viewers to reflect on their hidden traits and the potential consequences of ignoring or mishandling them.
Their stories highlight the importance of understanding and integrating all parts of oneself, even the darker aspects, to prevent them from manifesting in destructive ways.
Connecting with Your Shadow
Whilst Dexter and Breaking Bad are works of fiction, they illustrate the dangers that can arise from having a shadow self as the main driver, or suppressing it until it takes over.
If you have parts of yourself that you keep suppressed and this has caused you a great deal of turmoil to yourself and others, it might be worthwhile to consider getting a therapist.
Although a therapist cannot ‘fix’ you, they can help you acknowledge your shadow, recognise patterns and triggers, and make suggestions.
Becoming Aware
As I explored the idea of the ‘authentic self’. I became very aware that my actions sometimes conflicted with my inner beliefs. I sought therapy as a way to understand how to become more authentic so that my actions fit the ideal I had in mind.
Most of us understand what we ought to do, but we often take long detours away from our intended path – potentially getting lost forever. My therapist made me aware that I needed to connect more with my shadow as this was the source of conflict in my life.
Discovering this concept of the shadow self prompted me to find out more about this idea, and made me understand that I could exist in union with these ‘undesirable elements’.
3-Steps
Here are 3-steps that I followed to uncover and accept my shadow:
Recognition
The first step is to get to know your shadow self.
I found that perhaps the most important part of this process was when my therapist suggested that I understand the trigger points for my shadow.
This involved writing down when I felt my shadow self was in the driving seat and considering when I felt this trigger point.
I discovered that when I felt disconnected, despairing, and lonely, my shadow self would take over and effectively be in the driving seat. In these times, I now know that it is important for me to reach out to others – particularly challenging as a dismissive avoidant.
The process of journaling can certainly help you create an ordered dialogue between you and your shadow self.
Compassion and Acceptance
The next step is to understand these dark parts of yourself as the result of past experiences and to learn to accept them.
This effort to make these experiences ‘bound’ by a context and understandable makes them less frightening – you are not a monster, but a human.
Therapy can also help you gain acceptance over these dark aspects of your existence as an external mediator can offer an objective eye.
Looking Forward
Channelling your shadow self into other pursuits can help you release a build-up of tension. Jung referred to the shadow as the ‘seat of creativity‘.
I think part of the reason why creativity arises from a greater connection with our shadow is that art is, to some extent about capturing the essence of reality.
How can we truly express reality if we are unaware of our hidden natures?
Dance has helped me channel my emotions and connect with other people. Blogging too has also helped me channel some of my energy into a creative pursuit and built my confidence.
Becoming more aware of our shadow self gives us back control. If you are aware that your shadow is leading you towards actions you might regret, then you may be able to change course.
Final Thoughts
Understanding and integrating our shadow self is not just a psychological exercise, but a journey towards living a more authentic and balanced life. Embrace your shadow, and let it guide you towards self-discovery and personal growth.
Have you ever experienced a moment when your shadow self took control?
Share your story in the comments below and let’s discuss how we can better understand these hidden parts of ourselves.
References and Further Reading
For those interested in exploring this concept further, I recommend Carl Jung’s “The Archetypes and The Collective Unconscious” and Robert A. Johnson’s “Owning Your Own Shadow: Understanding the Dark Side of the Psyche.”
